Jokes

Is this a second hand shop ?


Yes Sir

Good. Can you fit one to my watch then please !




In the park this morning I was surrounded by Lions!

Lions !!, in the Park ?

Well, dandelions !



How is business going ?

I'm looking for a new cashier

But you only had a new one last week

Yes, that's the one I'm looking for !



Do you have any invisible ink ?

Certainly sir. What colour ?



What did you get for christmas ?

A mouthorgan, its the best present I've ever had.

Why ?

My mum gives me extra pocket money every week not to play it !



Whatdo you mean by telling everyone that I'm an idiot ?

I'm sorry, I didn't know it was supposed to be a secret!



This match won't light !

That's funny, it did this morning !



A noise woke me up this morning.

What was that ?

The crack of dawn !



Have you ever seen a duchess ?

Yes - it's the same as an English "s" !



It's gone forever - forever I tell you !

What has ?

Yesterday !